101 Days to go.

So, I got my wedding dress and I LOVE it! But can I be honest and say the whole experience was a little too much for me. I actually had a really hard time with the entire thing and wasn't really looking forward to it. Isn't that sad!!!!! I felt a TON of pressure to pick the right dress or to have the first one be "perfect". I had cruised threw magazines for months and not one dress stood out to me. They all kinda looked the same after a while. Not to mention that at EVERY shop I went to (6 total) I kept getting lectured that I was "late to the game, and there are going to be fees." It got kinda old, but eventually I kept having the style narrowed down until I found THE dress. not what I had initially thought, but it was the only dress I put on that I felt like me. so WHEW that was over.

I have come to realize that I am not over excited about the wedding, but I am SO excited to be married and super stoked about our honeymoon. We are going here and we get to fly first class/ business class there (Thanks to my mom's expiring airline miles!). I am not sure why I am having this adversion to planning the wedding - maybe it is because this entire "wedding industry" is over priced and I just don't see the point. Invest in your future, not just one day. With all that said... I still want my "day" to be perfect - and if I have shared that with my family and friends, well it will be. That is what matters to me.

A month. A MONTH!!!

How has it been almost a month since my last post. As you can tell life has been pretty non-stop busy. So, I am taking some time out to give you all an update.

Much has happened - I am now working with a firm out of Texas that handles Life Settlements - which for those of you who don't know - Is basically investing in life insurance policies. The supreme court ruled back around 1918 that a life insurance policy was deemed property and well there are people who realize they don't need them and can sell them to investors who wish to keep them going and then get the benefits of cashing out the policy. I am really excited about this for a few reasons - 1. I have found I love the world of finance and am currently looking for a full time job in this new world, eventually leading to my stock brokers license. and 2. It is just interesting. Not enough people are knowledgeable about money. If you need some place to start - check out Daveramsey.com. I took his Financial Peace course and that started me on this journey.

anyway... back to my busyness... I am still doing freelance design work here and there, recently started working for the Census, and picked up a part time gig at Macys. (this was pretty much for the discount). The Reverend and I are both pretty excited about this. We are going to need some new stuff and what better way than to get it with a discount!! :) So with all of this - my "work" hours seem a little crazy. I keep telling myself that all this craziness will all be worth it in the end. Let's hope I get there.

Well on top of all that for me - The Reverend has had some changes as well. The biggest one impacting me is that his college minister has stepped down and for the mean time The Rev will be filling in. At this point in time there is no end date to this temporary position, so this means his normal job on top of taking care of the college kids. So, I have jumped in with both feet and am doing my best to help him. So far we are into week 1 of the official "take over" and so far so good... I have a feeling though that these college kids are going to wear me out!!!! HOW, HOW did we stay up so late, function on such little sleep and eat like crap all the time. I am sure you will be hearing more stories as we go along.

Other than that - there are a few more things, but I will not bore you with the details.. things like we are debating whether we sell The Revs house he has back in GA or keep the renters, trying to find a post wedding place to live for us, picking out furniture for said place, crossing my fingers that The Rev can finish off his Doctoral project in time for the wedding so he can graduate in December, making sure the puppy gets out every once in a while :), and trying to find more time in the day.

I feel like I have many wedding details to finalize, but not stressing too much - lots of things coming together and when I have time I try to do something in hopes that later I will have more time.

for now here are some pictures....

This is my nephew, Bradley. He is going to be 2 in a few weeks and is SO CUTE!!! a few weeks after his birthday he is going to become a big brother. WOO HOO!!! Still waiting to see if it is a boy or girl. :)



We received our first few wedding presents off our registry! That was fun! Here is The Rev trying to sort through all the boxes. There were about 5 total we had to go through.

I started packing up a few things for the move day, Aug 14. I know I am early.. just trying to stay ahead of the ever growing TO-DO list.



EASTER EGGS!!! So, how come this seems more cool than it actually is? This is a lesson in patients because the eggs don't dye as fast as you think they will. still pretty though. :)

How to Get a Man's Attention 101

LADIES!!! For those of you looking to find a man. I have a solution for you. :) The Reverend and I were driving on the freeway the other day and saw this car. Naturally I took a photo to document it. The license plate said T BARBIE on it. No judgement, just stating this incredible fact. One word. AMAZING!

The food we eat.

Food. I LOVE FOOD. But there are changes I am starting to make to the food that I eat. One of the them is the elimination of High Fructose Corn Syrup. Now this isn't easy because there is food out there like - oreo's - that I LOVE. But Trader Joe's has some great alternative with no hfcs. The Reverend and I started noticing that so much of what is at the grocery store has HFCS in it - especially condiments, cereal, and really most packaged food. For those of you interested in what it actually does to your diet, here is a great article! (Notice the part about most of our corn products are genetically modified - DONT GET ME STARTED HERE!! I feel like this issue is very scary. If you don't know anything about this, I encourage you to do some research because it will impact us and the next generations for sure!)

I really started reading up on this whole "organic" thing about 8 months ago when I choose to come off the hormone shots I was receiving for Endometriosis. I had been on some form of hormones for three years and it definitely took a toll on my body. Fed up with the emotional roller-coaster and tired of a body i didn't recognize - I decided to stop.

I met with a Naturalist who lead me to this book. I recommend it for every lady out there. It is SO helpful if you would like alternatives to western medicine.

Also, I love this book!! and I am a huge *closet* Jillian fan. My sister had this book and it became a must read for me. She is very detailed on what to keep in your diet and what to eliminate.

And if any of you are more interested here are some books I have enjoyed on nutrition: Food, Inc, Super Foods RX, In Defense of Food, and Optimal Health Revolution.

For those of you in the Redlands area and want information on Farmers Markets or organics - here are some links I recommend. Redlands Organics, Organic Produce Buying Club/ Co-Op, The Farm, and Local Harvest (go "home" and you can find things in your area if you are not in Redlands).

Words.

In my early childhood years one of the physicians running those hearing & eye test at my school informed my parents that I could potentially have a hearing problem. So, my parents, being the amazing people they are, took me to see a few hearing specialists. I remember having to do all these strange tests. In the end they paid the money to have the MD come back and say "She is FINE! She just hears what she wants to hear." This has been pretty consistent through adulthood as well. I suffer from "selective hearing" as my mom calls it. HAHA.

On top of the selective hearing - there is the "random comments" I can tend to throw out. There are times in my life when I say things. Afterward when realize how it sounded to the receiver, I am mortified and apologize profusely because "THAT IS NOT WHAT I MEANT!!" It is a curse!! I am not sure whether my brain runs too fast for me to process or if I am just so scatter brained that this happens. It could also be that I, at times, can be a bad listener. I blame this on the fact that I am listening to the thoughts running through my head instead of actively listening to my company. This leave me with being "that girl" who interjects random ideas - well they aren't random. I just didn't help the listener get to the point that I am already at.

Here is the latest: My mom and I were in the living room and the TV was on. Wheel of Fortune was wrapping up and I noticed that each contestant was receiving money. So I mentioned my observation to my mom. This is how the conversation went.

Ruthie: Does each contestant win money?

Mom: Yeah. They make something around $1,000.00 just to go on the show.

Ruthie: Wow,..(pause)... you don't even need a personality to go on this show. (longer pause) Mom, You should go on this show!

Mom: So, you don't think I have a personality?

Ruthie (with confused look): No, that is not what I said.... OH!!!! NO!!!

Seriously! How do you recover this? My mom, at least, understands my *suffering* and so gives me much grace. I still think she should go on Wheel of Fortune.

The Cleaners.

I like to laugh and pretty much you could say that everyday there is something to smile or laugh about. My family will tell you this is because I am very much like Miss Congeniality and at one point I remember my mom telling me "that is why God made you so cute". Strange things happen to me - they just do. I'm blessed with this gift.

Here is the latest and I keep giggling over it. This past weekend The Reverend needed to take his shirts to the cleaners. Side note: I had taken them in previously to get cleaned while I was helping take care of my man down with the mono. Remember that I had given the mono to him; you see the sucking up taking place here. :) Well as he was sorting out the shirts on the counter he realized that all the shirts had the name "GALLO" written in them. (HAHAHAHAH I am laughing AGAIN!) Naturally, he asked the nice Vietnamese lady about it - to which he couldn't tell if she didn't understand why he would have these shirts with the wrong last name (did he steal them?) or if she just didn't understand him at all. But now, here he is with all his nice work shirts with my name in all of them. (BAHAHAHAH!!)

I had NO IDEA that they would write my name in his new shirts. I might have put it under his name then! It feels like I am sending him off to camp (you know, where the parents label every item of clothing). When I told him that, he said I was no longer allowed near any of his clothes. Poor guy!!! Seriously, what is he doing with me. He did offer to change his name instead of me having to do it, cause it does seem like the ink is pretty permanent.

Wedding Plans.

The Reverend and I registered on Friday at Bed Bath and Beyond and Macys. Let me first say, I had NO IDEA how long that takes. We spent a good 4 hours at Bed Bath and Beyond and then took a quick break and headed out to Macys. We are pretty much easy going when it comes to all this wedding stuff. I think the older you get the less you really care about this "perfect" wedding. Reality is - it is going to be 4 hours of our life and we'd rather use the money in other ways that are a little long lasting.

So, back to the registry marathon day (and other wedding choices). MAN-O-MAN are there SO MANY choices to be made, what color towels, what color flowers, what table linens, what kind of sheets, what color sheets, what type of dishes, which pans, which glasses,.. and the list goes on.. and on.. and on!!

Now those of you who know me, know that I am the outgoing personality with a little bit of a "get it done attitude" in there and The Reverend, well he is the complete opposite. Mr. Responsible with a lot of the "get it done attitude". It actually makes for a great balance in our relationship. When it comes to making choices though - both of us want to make sure that we have all the facts and make an educated choice. This whole "registry marathon day" felt like a lesson in making a choice and moving on. After four hours at Bed Bath and Beyond, I got in the car and start doubting whether or not that ONE item was really what I wanted. HAHAHA!! The Rev champed this out, encouraged me by saying we can always take it back IF we get it and in the end we didn't really change many of the choices we had made. I guess this is just the start of a lifetime of decisions that will need to be made.

Photo of the day: My sister and I at the beach for my Dad's Annual Beach & Bucket of Chicken Father's Day. Not sure why, but I LOVE this photo. It makes me laugh all the time.

MMMMM Food.

I have been blessed with women in my family who cook. My mom and grandmothers are AMAZING cooks. For a long time I thought this was a skill that had past me by. I am actually learning that it is years of experience and the ability to be teachable that made them so great!

So, mom recently had surgery on her Achilles tendon (because she tore it a year ago) and has been on recovery for about 2 months now. That means a lot, A LOT, of sitting around (something she is not so excited about). I will say, I have benefited from this because 1. she has been watching cooking shows non-stop and sharing the info with me, 2. I am getting married and NEED to know this now that I am going to be cooking more in my life and 3. I have been the one cooking dinners for a bit - meaning it's time to apply the skills.

In the process I have found that I have a love for food. Ok, now I knew this, but I didn't know I would enjoy actually making it. For many years I have loved baking, but within the last few months I have found that I love cooking. There are a few restrictions to this love seeing that it needs to have all of the following for me to really enjoy it, otherwise it feels like a chore and something I have to do. So here is my perfect cooking environment

1. A great recipe or something new I want to try. I have to cook off a recipe. I am not one of those people who can just "throw something together" and it is amazing. I wish I could, but I can't.
2. Learn a new technique or skill. This is the best part, because cooking is a learning experience.
3. All the ingredients or know how to substitute for missing ingredients.
4. The right tools. - this I have found extra interesting and there are some great list on what you need in a kitchen
5. Time to enjoy to process and not trying to meet a timeline. Lets face it, timelines create more stress.
6. Great music and a great beverage. This also adds to the "stress-free environment"
7. Family or friends present. Life is better with people to share things with. period.

So in the last few days here is the list of things that I have made:

Homemade Bread Pudding with a Whiskey Sauce (for my dad's birthday on saturday)

Julia Child's Boeuf Bourguignon from The Art of French Cooking (It is easy and YUMMY!!!! was a big hit for my Grandmothers 90th birthday on sunday!)

Jacque's Pommes de Terre Mont d'Or (a mashed potato dish with Gruyere cheese - great for a day old mashed potatoes that you want to do something yummy with!)

Healthy Chicken Enchiladas (everything from scratch, except the tortillas, with lots of fresh veggies)

Buttermilk Cornbread (always good with a honey on top - especially local honey! Which for those of you interested, is good for building a resistance to allergies. Needs to be the honey from the same region you live in.)

Almond dipped in chocolate and Anise with chocolate chip Biscotti's. and the only photo I got was of the biscotti - here you go!

Clothes, Crafts, & Caillebotte.

So there are few things in life that really get my creative juices going, I am going to start sharing things that I find or remind me of beauty.

One is clothes, really cute vintage clothes. And now, I know that I don't dress like this, but at some point in my life I want to. Anthropologie is always a huge favorite of mine. I love EVERYTHING in that store. Recently I stumbled across Mod Cloth and well... they are awesome!! It took me a while to figure out their measurement system. I actually thought everything was made for "little people", but turns out they only measure one side of the garment to determine size. Once I got it and started looking around, well it was LOVE.

The other thing I stumbled upon as I was trying to figure out the whole wedding invitation design was The Urban Craft Center in Santa Monica. It looks amazing. So, one of these Saturdays I will be taking a trip out to see if it is actually good. Their website inspired me to start pulling out some of my sewing projects that have been sitting dormant for a while. One day. A dream of mine is to have a room in my home solely dedicated to sewing, glue, glitter, woodworking, buttons & ribbon, modge podge, and even a dark room in it. Of course this would be a room where anything creative goes....ahh to dream.

I leave you with one of my favorite paintings of Paris. I love Paris - it is one city in the world I could never get tired of visiting. and I love art. So there you go.
Paris Street; Rainy Day, 1877 Oil on canvas 212.2 x 276.2 cm
Gustave Caillebotte
French, 1848-1894



And of course for those of you really interested a little background:

Beginning in 1851, the government of Napoleon III transformed the old streets of Paris into a new system of grand boulevards. This painting abounds with evidence of the city’s rebuilding. Gustave Caillebotte selected a complex intersection near the Saint-Lazare train station for his subject, distorting the size of the buildings and the distance between them to create a wide-angle view that reflects the sweeping modernity of this capital city.

The artist’s family owned property in the busy neighborhood depicted here, which was populated by wealthy Parisians and workers of various sorts. In the foreground, a man and woman wearing fashionable clothes stroll down the sidewalk. Behind them stand the uniformly designed buildings that were added to Paris during the renovations overseen by French administrator Baron Haussmann.

The highly crafted surface, monumental size, geometric order, and elaborate perspective of Paris Street; Rainy Day (the artist used a gaslight to separate the foreground from the middle and distant views) are more academic than Impressionist in character. Caillebotte clearly intended these elements to underscore the power of painting to capture the momentary quality of everyday life. In this cropped composition, it is easy to imagine that in just a moment, everyone in the painting will have moved and nothing will be the same.

Cars & Money.

So, one of the things that Jason has mentioned he would like to change once we actually get married is my car. Now, I love this car. I have been the proud owner for almost 9 years. The best feature is that it's paid off. LOVE THAT! (For those of you interested, I FULLY subscribe to Dave Ramsey's idea on paying for cars you can check it out here.) Best of all my car is a convertible and, in so cal where it rains so little, makes for a great getting around town car. Especially when the air is so nice out. (for those of you who know the smell that comes with a convertible when it rains - that is my LEAST favorite part of this car)

Well, on Saturday, my little VW just decided to stop working as I crossed the intersection to our church. BUMMER. I was able to pull over to the side and call for help. While I was sitting there waiting for the tow-truck, I opened the glove compartment and it broke!!! HUGE Bummer. I think when one thing goes wrong on a car it just amplifies all the other little things. So there I am sitting and almost in tears because I feel like it is falling apart when I look down and notice a tear in my seat fabric. SERIOUSLY UGH, because not working wasn't enough. I used to think Jason was crazy for wanting to get rid of my little car, but I think I would have sold it to the first reasonable offer on Saturday. So, now I am patiently waiting to hear what is wrong, how much it will cost to fix and taking some time to "just look" at the cars available.

The Puppy.

Everyone meet Rosco The Puppy. This is Jason's doggie. He's actually turning 3 in the next week or so. For his birthday Jason bought a "Pupcake" from this gourmet doggie treat shop in Newport Beach and he loved it last night. I have never seen him drool so much. He really is a great dog! And for those of you who know me well, probably know that I am not an animal "LOVER". I like animals, but usually from a distance (with the exception of horses. I love horses). Well, in just 5 short months me and rosco are going to be roommates. I actually can't wait because I love this dog. He is so much fun and so filled with energy and that face!!! It kills me. More to come from him in the future I am sure.

Me, The Reverend, and Mono.

So, There have been some really exciting things happening in my life. One is The Reverend (or as he likes to be called, Jason) This past Saturday he popped the questions. We had such a great day!! We went down to Newport Beach for the day and enjoyed Sprinkles cupcakes, hot dogs and a walk around Fashion Island. We did find a gourmet pet treat shop and of course got Rosco something to bring home! Then from there we headed down to Balboa Island for some Starbucks and a trip on the ferry over to the pier. It was great. I was a little suspicious that Jason wanted to spend a day out because he has been down sick for two weeks and plus he kept his bag with him the entire day! :) a little clue, but I thought he might be trying to trick me and actually had no idea that he actually had the ring in hand. He had schemed the entire day and it was perfect! Once we got to the pier, we settled down on the beach and watched the sunset. It was the perfect time to ask, but about an hour and half went by and so I concluded that he wasn't going to ask me. But I was wrong! As soon as the sun set he turned to me and told me that was the spot on a date over a year ago that he knew he was going to marry me. So he asked, and I of course said yes!! So after a few pictures and packing up we headed out to dinner in Huntington Beach over looking the ocean. It was the perfect day!!!

The next day Jason seemed to be feeling even worse than the day before. And so, after being coaxed by my friend Nurse Lana to take him to urgent care, we were off. This was the 3rd time in 3 weeks that I have taken him to the urgent care and I was really hoping they would send us home with more information than the last two visits. Well, sure enough after MANY blood draws and after being sent home, Jason was called and told he has Mononucleosis. Just our luck! One day after getting engaged he is diagnosed with the kissing disease. And little did I know, I probably gave it to him!!!!!!! I had mono years ago but one thing I didn't know is that even if I don't have the symptoms I am a carrier of the virus and can become contagious on occasion. So, for all of you reading this DONT share my drinks :)

All in all it was an eventful and memorable weekend!! Here are some photos of us out on our date.

A New Season

Well for those of you who even follow this.. you might notice some changes. One would be that I deleted a lot of the older post; mostly it felt refreshing to start over. My sister (whom I affectionately call kissy or pookers) has mentioned that I needed to update something. So, in an attempt to keep those of you who are physically distant, but not far from my heart...These updates are for you. 

You might notice that I chose to leave the information regarding my grandmothers funeral and well, I just couldn't bring myself to delete that. That was the beginning of a dark season in my life. We all go through them and well it seemed like years of changes were slammed into a quick 11 months. That event marked that season and I can honestly say that my life is different and MUCH better. I am a little scared and at the same time made new. I finally have a deep understanding of God's grace in my life. An understanding I challenge anyone to find. You will be overwhelmed. 

Many things have changed and life is just getting started. It feels good, really good actually.  So here is to a new blogging start.  I will leave you with some photos of a trip from 2003 to France and Belgium with some of my favorite people. 

  

Home.

Today, there is something that feels different. 3 months ago we buried my grandmother – actually to the day. I have experienced more emotions related to grief this past week than I’ve had in a while. The sadness can be so exhausting and crippling. At this point there is not a day that goes by where I wouldn’t do anything to see my grandmother again. I can almost feel her hand touch mine, as she did so often in the last few years of her illness.

But still there is something about coming home. My parents live only an hour from my house and on a good day it only takes about 45 minutes. But the drive is my favorite part. I usually leave at night and drive alone, something that I have grown accustom to. The roads are quite and there is the final 15 minutes where I finally enter the valley. Looking out into the distance I can begin to point out each one of the lights in front of me. I can show you where the different “cities” in the mountains are just by the cluster of lights and their placement in the black sky. I am sure that if you didn’t know the mountains were a large part of the valley – well in the night you would have no idea that they are there. But I know. And I know where things end and begin so much so that everything feels like home. From the crystal clear sky, to the mountains, to the rows and rows of orange groves… it all tells me that I am home. A place so familiar, I feel like myself even in the midst of my absence from it.

Matoeska.

Matoeska. That is what my grandpa called my grandmother for their 63 years of marriage. It means little kitten in Flemish.

I was asked to speak at her funeral. An honor that I will never forget, here is what I said.



Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God. When I think of grandma, I think of graciousness, strength, beauty, kindness, gentleness and love.

I did not really understand the special relationship I had with my grandmother until I went off to college in the fall of 97. For 3 years we spent time writing letters back and forth. It was always on that random tuesday that I would walk to the mailboxes and see a card in there. Being like every college student, anxious for a piece of home, I was so excited that a letter from my grandmother had arrived. Someone was thinking about me. Enough to write it down and tell me. and she did faithfully. I never doubted whether or not my grandmother loved me. I always knew. and yet she would still take the time to ask me what more she could do for me. I wish now that I would have told her then that it wasn't what she did for me, it was just that she was there. and she was always there. I am not quite sure when it happened. it just seemed like all of a sudden I looked at my grandmother and I knew that there was my kindred spirit.

I have very few memories of holidays that don't include heading to grandma's house. In fact, it became normal. and while most of my friends grandparents lived "far away" or they had never really developed a relationship with them. Mine lived right down the street, maybe even less than a mile. As a little girl I remember going for walks around 40th street and golden. Exploring the word around me hoping to find some sort of treasures. I would tell myself what a romantic idea it would be to walk to grandma and grandpa's. I always knew that if I did there would be some sweets and a car ride home. As a teenager I remember thinking that our family was strange. Walking in the front door at a family function one would be faced with a loud, crazy and rambunctious family. And of course, as much food as anyone could imagine and Grandma would be sitting on the couch at the center of it all. Now, as a quasi-adult my perspective has changed a bit. I embrace all the things that I thought made us weird. I recognize the comfort that one woman brought to an entire family, to those she would fight for and that she unconditionally loved. She made the holidays full of food, warmth, laughter and smiles. I remember walking through the door and being flooded with smells of dinner and kisses of welcoming. I was lucky that my grandparents lived close. I always knew the door was open. I can't help but think of us united so tightly through one person. and when I think of our family it is her face that I see.

Years have past since we lived "just down the street", but i will never forget the smiles that would flood my grandmas face when she would see me walk through the door. i will never forget hearing her say, "oh my goodness" when she realized it was me on the phone or seeing her blow me a kiss as i left the house. In every way she showed me her love. I can remember coming over for many dinners and learning how to make Belgium stew. We would finish eating at sit at the dinner table for what seemed like hours I think these were my favorite times when we would sit and just talk. I would hear about her being a "rascal", she would tell story's from her life, the lessons that she had learned along the way. She continued to amaze me and I could never hear enough.I began to realize through these times just what a special role she played in our family. She would always say that she was so blessed, but really I think it was the other way around. We were blessed.

Toward the first part of this year I had been gong through many transitions. Life has been confusing and simple. And finally it all makes sense. Or maybe I have just come to realize that I don’t need it to make sense. That each day is a gift meant to be shared by those you love. I understand that life is precious and love is something to hold onto. My grandmother taught me what it meant to really love. A few months ago I had the chance to take care of her for a night, something I thought I was never capable of. I had been asked a few times over the years and always said no. but this time I said of course. I knew that she needed me. On my drive back home, i sat there a little overwhelmed. Because of my encounter with this amazing woman finally I knew what it meant to love someone in the way that my grandmother did all these years. you see that weekend it wasn't about me, it was about her and what I could do for her. She had lived that example all her life. I can't even comprehend today how much i will miss her. She has left the biggest impression on this little heart of mine.

I will attribute my dad with saying this, the greatest example you could leave behind is that of a life well lived. Today I look back on the life that my grandmother lived and I am inspired to do the same. to live and to love.